SmashFarmersOnly.com
Where heartbreak meets hay bales.
Not a dating site. Just a bar. With guitars. And poor decisions
• Verified Smashers
“Only the most emotionally unstable musicians allowed.”
• Tractor Compatibility™
“We’ll match you based on string gauge and trauma.”
• Boot Scootin’ Bachelorettes
“Must own a tambourine. No exceptions.”
Testimonials
“I came for the whiskey, I left with a restraining order.”
— Dusty, 3-time Smash Champion“I brought my ex. We got back together. Then we broke up again.”
— Hannah, pedal steel witch
Thank you
SmashFarmersOnly.com is real.
Every Twosday at The Loafhole.
No cover. $10 to leave. No promises.